Ever since I was a kid, I was obsessed with writing something. I remember writing a poem when I was around ten years old and writing a long story when I was twelve. Since then, I have always come back to writing, having tried everything else that I was temporarily distracted with. That’s how I started my first blog when I was in college, and one thing led to another, and I have been in this journey ever since.
I love to write, and I also hate to write. Not always, but there are days when I struggle to write something, and that’s how I have a love-hate relationship with writing. Let me explain. Converting something that’s on my mind from thoughts to language requires a lot of cognitive effort. Some days, it comes so naturally to me and some days I wouldn’t be able to write a sentence without pulling my hair out. That’s why I love and hate writing.
In my early days of writing, I was under the impression that if I am passionate about something, I would never hate it or give up. Though I used to enjoy writing, the fact that on some days I give up and hate writing made me doubt if I really was focusing on the right hobby or if I was just obsessed about something that I am not good at. Several years later, I have realised that, even with the things I am passionate about, I will have bad days, I will give up sometimes, and that doesn’t necessarily mean I am doing the wrong thing. I have now understood that, being passionate about something doesn’t mean I am automatically good at it, or that I would not have bad days, but it's just what I enjoy doing and what I come back to again and again even when I struggle and fail many times. Then I learnt about writer’s block and realised that it was not just me, but something that every writer faced. I read journals, articles, and memoirs of the world’s best writers, and everyone has written about experiencing days when they were stuck and just couldn’t write. Becoming aware of this reality made me feel at peace and gave me more confidence to try again when I failed to write.
Writing is hard, especially publicly. Writing about yourself and your ideas is an exercise in deciding how much of your thoughts you are ready to share with others. To write publicly is to be vulnerable to people who are outside your circle and to random strangers who may come across your work and read it. This is not easy, especially in this modern era, as the internet is written in ink. When everyone is opinionated and divided, it's not easy to share your opinions without the fear of backlash or hate. It can also prove to be dispiriting and exasperating when you are accused of being biased or hypocritical.
Once, I read a wonderful post by Vlad Savov which gave me a really good way to think about writing. Since then, I have learnt that, writing whatever is on my mind, however opinionated, is an inherent and necessary part of making my writing unique and special. I will try to summarise the article by paraphrasing Vlad's main points in my own words.
Giving each thought a decontextualised blank slate and only asserting the bare facts about something is neither engaging nor particularly useful. Only by applying a writer's preferences and biased opinions, to any writing, can it be of any use or interest to the readers. To be perfectly impartial would negate the value of having a human being write at all. Subjectivity and personal touch is an inherent and necessary part of making commentary insightful and interesting.
Sharing what I like or dislike, what my opinion is, complaining or celebrating is all part of making my writing as personal as it can be. I know that I will not be perfect, no one is. I know that I will not be unbiased because opinions are inherently biased. When you start reading my work, you will understand the values that are important to me, and you can calibrate what you interpret from my reading based on that.
And that epiphany is what led me to create this blog and few more projects, and start writing again.